The Universal Trauma Event…

It was my hope that this blog might open some dialogue channels that might look at this as an unseen ultimate trauma event. We all know parents who can tell stories of dropping their child off to school and how:

tierneytherapy

2021-08-17 3 min read

It was my hope that this blog might open some dialogue channels that might look at this as an unseen ultimate trauma event. We all know parents who can tell stories of dropping their child off to school and how:

Some wont get out of the car

Have to be dragged into the classroom and then the parents run away,

Their child crying continually and this going on for days

And the child who embraces the whole affair as a big adventure, they can’t wait to start, and its the parents walk away feeling the disconnection.

Tell me, the children that react ‘poorly’, might they be:

mentally ill

come from an abusive home

come from a dysfunctional home

come from a neglected childhood,

all of the above

or

Is it possible that the children are from healthy homes and their response is down to the assumption that they might possibly have experienced an event at birth that robbed them of the ability to process what was happening?

I shared the story, of that the 4 year old younger version of me; looking back now, I believe but can’t confirm it; that his basic surveil instinct that was damaged was the fight response

Looking back on my timeline , every aspect of me from that 4 year old, through the trauma event my 12 year old aspect experienced ,to the boarding school event that my 13–17 year old aspects suffered, and on into adulthood, the main coping skills used were anxiety, disassociation, depression, blame, shame, guilt and on into addiction, self harm, self abuse and eventually a geographical change.

My timeline fluctuated from flight to freeze; but fighting or accepting were not in my armor. they should have been, but they weren’t.

I lived in a middle class family with two brothers and two sisters and I was the odd one out.

I don’t believe I was born mentally ill, I don’t believe it was in my genes and it skipped two generations and my siblings to get to me.

I can accept that I was uncomfortable with most people places and thing but I hid it well. I learned that I could experience moments of insanity, could think and do crazy things, but generally was also capable of healthy same thinking and actions.

Even today, 50 odd years later, I can still have my moments, but I accept they are just feelings and when I have them, it’s my subconscious mind trying to tell me ‘all is not right with the world’.

By processing, healing and releasing each of the aspects and their trauma events, the ones that mattered the most, I was able to separate myself from all of my past and to learn that my whole life is about the present and making plans for the future.

think about it, wouldn’t it be lovely if you could give your baggage, your demons, your nightmares and flashbacks back to the rightful owners, even if that is a 9 month old baby or a 4 year old child or a 12 year old child, they got through those events then, now they are more powerful, more experienced and have the support of a host of god’s angels and their ancestors, to take this this burden off you each time

I mentioned at the beginning of this blog that it has caused some dialogue and as such, some professionals were not on the same page, but whether one agrees or not, surely we can use this timeline, to enable those who suffer with past trauma memory and ptsd, to give it away to the rightful owner freely in a safe and non-intrusive manner.

We cannot be in two places at once!

We cannot heal the pain of another by taking it on!

We wouldn't want our future selves to carry our present; we would want it back; so they could be free to live the life they have; for us; as a big adventure.

www.tierneytherapy.com